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Writer's pictureEvie

Take My Hand by Dolen Perkins-Valdez

Yay... it has felt as though it has been a long time coming but I have finally had my first 5 star read of 2024 and what a beautifully compelling read it is! Take My Hand is an incredibly written, devastating book that I absolutely devoured. It's the type of book that changes how you think of different aspects of life and makes you feel yourself grow as a person through understanding. 

 

I think I read this book at such a relevant time (although that being said, when in recent years hasn’t been relevant?) what with all the discourse around abortion and fertility laws over the last few years it just made me really reflect on how far we have come in some ways whilst how much the same everything is in others. It really was heart wrenching to think about.


What is it about?

This books is set in Alabama in the 1970's and follows Civil who is fresh out of nursing school working for her community Family Planning Clinic. Civil is passionate about connecting with those in her community that are less fortunate than her and believes in women's voices being as loud as men's particularly when relating to their own bodies and decisions.


We follow Civil as she meets with patients, and is faced with the harshness of reality outside her protected upbringing and bubble. We journey with her as she begins to understand the harsh realities of what is happening at the clinic where she works. Civil quickly connects with two sisters who she visits at their home in an inhabitable cabin where they live with their father and grandmother. Civil takes the family into her heart whilst trying to battle with the contradicting aspects of her job role. Civil grapples with her conscience around administering the young girls birth control, with her reservations and guilt getting louder the more she connects and cares for the family. Civil becomes a regular fixture in the families life and is shocked one day upon visiting them to find that the girls are not there.


Civil cannot comprehend what has happened and tries to process her role in everything that has unfolded. We watch Civil fight not only with the system but with herself and what she knows, we see her develop from a young girl into a woman. We watch her make mistakes but we also watch her love with her whole heart. This book is one of empowerment, friendship, love and strength.

 

My Thoughts

I think one thing that I found really compelling about this book was how toxic the desire to be a 'saviour' can be. Of course I have thought about this before in bigger ways but I had not really appreciated it from an 'acts of kindness' perspective, it was an element of this book that really made me think and reflect on life and just how important it is to not sweep in and try to improve a situation for someone even if you think you can or should but instead letting them tell you what they need/want from you. 

 

Mace and Mrs Williams were both such great characters to get to know, I think they really shone a light on the disadvantages they faced and how it continued the cycle, their girls were so much more exposed to the cruelness of the world because of them being uneducated and it just demonstrated how this then feeds the whole endless cycle until something forces it to stop. It honestly just broke my heart. 

 

I think the story being told from Civil's perspective worked really well, she was navigating growing up but also learning about the cruelties of the world at the same time. I liked that she didn’t just go through it without mistakes, but that she learnt from them and tried to do better. I liked that she had her own emotions and feelings alongside the storyline of the sisters and had her own stuff to deal with at the same time. I liked how she was an open minded character and how through her being open to learning and doing better it made us as the reader get that wider understanding. I think as much as the story was about the fertility treatments and so much mistreatment of the young women it was also about Civil growing up and trying to navigate life. The set up was just perfectly balanced to be honest and it just had such a positive impact on my overall enjoyment of the story, connection to the characters and investment in their wellbeing.

 

Overall this book was absolutely devastating, it tore out my heart and made me feel such a deep sadness for humanity but at the same time it was filled with pockets of love and hope for better and really demonstrated the power of just one voice in the face of injustice. It demonstrated that we can't be perfect but that we can try to do better and that that in itself is enough. This book and it's characters just felt so true to life in both the good and the bad, it worked so well and will stay with me for a really long time. All of the stars!!


If you loved this you will love...

  • House of Eve by Sadeqa Johnson

  • The Women by Kristin Hannah

  • The Mountains Sing by Nguyen Phan Que Mae

  • Peach Blossom Spring by Melissa Fu


Trigger Warnings

It can always be hard to identify trigger warnings for a book as content can be so subjective so this list is in no way exhaustive but I try to call out any major things that jump out at me that could potentially be distressing for others:

  • Fertility/Infertility/Abortion/Pregnancy

  • Medical Trauma/ Medical Abuse

  • Child Abuse

  • Racism

  • Sexual Assault

  • Grief/Death of a Parent

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